The following post was written by Sheila Coppi, a wife, stay-at-home mama to her 1 year old son who prefers to call her “mum” rather than “mama,” and lifestyle blogger at With Love, Sheila. She drinks too much coffee, eats too much sugar, and always ends up buying something from the Target dollar spot – every single time. Sometimes she feels like she has no clue what she’s doing with this whole mama thing, but she’s loving every moment! You can connect with her over on her blog or on Instagram.
How many of you have ever felt the pressure to “have it all together”? So often we see amazing women on social media with perfect hair, makeup, and clothes. Their kids always look amazing as they are doing some sort of crazy, intricate craft that must have been found on Pinterest. We see immaculate pictures of their homes or the delicious three course meals they cook. It seems like they are living perfect lives and that they “have it all together”.
Here’s the thing with social media though – we aren’t ever getting the whole picture! These women are NOT perfect. We have to remember that we are only seeing the highlights of their lives. Even with this in mind, however, it can still be tempting to compare our lives to theirs.
I have always struggled with feeling like I am not doing enough. After I became a mom, this problem only got worse. I
struggled struggle with balancing taking care of my son, keeping the house in order, and making the time to do the things that I love.
I feel so guilty if I don’t take the time to just sit down and be present with my son. But, anytime I do this, I often have a constant nagging feeling that something isn’t get done. My son is already one -and I STILL have trouble cooking dinner most nights!
Before he was born, I knew how long everything would take and I would start with enough time to have dinner done by the time we wanted to eat. Now, I feel lucky to remember to throw something frozen in the microwave three minutes before dinnertime. In moments like these, I end up feeling like I’m not doing enough – like I’m not enough.
But you know what I’ve learned? I don’t have to be perfect – because I am not! I am actually quite far from perfect, and that is okay.
My house might not look like it should be in a magazine. I might only cook real dinners two times a week and throw something in the microwave or ask my husband to pick something up the rest of the week. My son might end up watching too many episodes of Curious George one day while I finally clean the bathroom for the first time in too long. I might even wear my hair in a ponytail all week.
I am not perfect. But that does not mean I am a failure or that I’m not enough. My life might not look like those women on social media, but that doesn’t mean that I am less of a person.
Women, why do we do this? Why do we constantly compare ourselves and our lives to others? Instead, why don’t we slow down and appreciate what we have right in front of us?! If we are constantly comparing our lives to others, we will miss what we already have.
When was the last time that you took a good look at your life and, instead of thinking of all the things you wished you could change, you pointed out all the things you LOVE!? Could you name just five things that you love about your life right now? Try it! Here are my five:
- I love that I am able to stay home with my son.
- I love the family photos I have on the walls in my home.
- I love that I can ask my husband to pick something up on the way home if I’m too tired to cook dinner!
- I love that I’ve been able to nurse my son for a year, even though it means I have held on to an extra 15 pounds.
- I love that my apartment is small enough to be vacuumed without having to move the cord 😉
Honestly, it was a bit difficult for me to come up with those five things. I almost changed it to three instead, but when I stop and think, and I stop comparing my life to someone else’s, there are SO many things that I realize I have to be thankful for!
So ladies, let’s stop comparing and start enjoying the lives we have!